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So I had a gentleman that I turned down leave me the following message(s) & I wasn’t even going to dignify his behavior with a response but felt it would be in the best interest of girls that he will contact in the future to let him know exactly why I wasn’t interested. Below you will find his 2 messages and then my reply.
"no offense, but the reason i am not your type is because i dont have the tall, athletic, pretty boy look with the moosed up highlited spikey hair. i have done studies in one of my pyc classes, and that seems to be the only type. not too many women go for the nice boy harry potter look."
"well just curious to how i'm not your type. you dont empahasize anything about looks on your profile, maybe you should if thats whats important. i think you might be missing out on a fun good guy, but i respect that you wroteme back anyway. most women think there to good to write guys like me back and then wonder why they're single and cant find a good guy. it mainly because every women out there is competeting for the same guy. i do think you're beautiful. does looks matter anyway? you're 30, in another 20 to 30 years looks are going to be gone anyway. maybe even in 10"Hello J,
Let me start by saying that you seem very bitter in your profile which I don’t find attractive but the main reasons that you aren’t my type is the fact that your interests don’t match mine, and your poor use of grammar and spelling. It really was not your appearance. I am not attracted to the “Gotti boy” image like you seem to think.
I would also like to give you a tip that sending a woman a message making assumptions as to why she isn’t interested only illustrates your lack of self-confidence. You immediately assume that she doesn’t like the way you look which is evidence that you are uncomfortable with your own appearance and that is not attractive at all. It seems as though you are trying to place blame on others for why you are not having luck in love, but you might want to look inside yourself to figure that out and maybe things will perk up. Best of luck to you in your search for true love!!
K
So I created a profile today for the FOX dating site for the local folks. I ran my first search & while I got over 20 matches, they weren’t actually matches. None of the guys I got matched with were attractive, at least not as far as I’m concerned…I’m not really into blondes or mullets! So here is my quam with dating sites & the people that are on them. Do you ever get that “hit” from someone & you go to check out their profile & their photo is taken from like 20 feet away, or it’s a group photo & they don’t have themselves labeled, or the worst is no photo at all. See, I used to feel bad when I’d ask for a photo from someone & then I’d get the pic and know why they didn’t post one, but do these people really think that they will get to know someone well enough that they will fall in love with their personality first? No, they won’t, because most people won’t have a 2nd conversation with someone without a photo. Now I don’t feel bad for just saying “sorry, but I just don’t find you attractive” and closing out our communication. I mean if they would have had the photo posted to begin with we could have skipped me being honest because I wouldn’t have contacted them in the first place. So I guess my suggestion to people is…if you don’t mind being told that you are unattractive then go ahead & omit the photo from your profile. If you would rather people not contact you because they don’t find you attractive from the get go, then post a damn photo! I also can’t stand the photos from like 5 years ago, are you kidding? I know you have more recent photos & the reason you aren’t posting them is probably because you don’t look as good now as you did then, but once you meet someone they are gonna figure it out so save yourself the embarrassment & just take a current solo photo from within 5 feet of you & post it! Thanks!
If you have some major deal breakers you may want to find out if this person participates in any of them no later than the 3rd date, especially if you like them otherwise you may really get into them only to find out 3 months later that he has 6 kids & they all live at home!
So I was checking my messages on my current dating site and I got a real gem from one of the guys. The subject of the mail was Nose & then the message said "is your nose yours or did you have it done? it's nice"This is not a joke!!
So I’m going to give you guys some insight on dating websites. I am a member of many of them but usually only actively use one at a time. I just finished up with a 3 month subscription to eHarmony, last year I did a 3 month stint on Yahoo personals, and currently I’m trying a free website called Plenty Of Fish. Now, I can’t say that my testimonials of these sites are going to be true for you as well but I’d like to give you my opinion of how they did/didn’t work for me. Well, obviously none of them have worked for me because I’m still single but some proved to be better because I met more people and went on more dates than other sites.
Yahoo Personals: This site proved true for all kinds of first dates, very few second dates, but I did meet some cool people. These guys may not have been actual dating material for me but were still my kind of people and I do remain in touch with a couple of these guys. I did meet one that seemed great but didn’t represent so well in person, it seemed as though I was hanging out with my ex. I was instantly turned off by that fact, because if I wanted to date my ex then he wouldn’t be my ex now would he?
Match.com: I’ve never subscribed I do have a profile on there but don’t actually use the site, ever. I think the fact that Dr. Phil has involvement with it makes me very hesitant to actually sign up.
EHarmony: This site was a huge waste of money for me. They “matched” me up with all kinds of people & guess what? None of them were actually matches. All these guys had kids, wanted kids, were fat, lived like 50 miles away…just nothing I wanted. I actually ended up talking to 2 and meeting 1. The first guy I was excited about until I found out he was a cop & then he told me that he screwed up his page & actually did want kids. Bye bye. The second one, he was nice & decent looking, but I didn’t feel any sexual chemistry & if I don’t feel anything after 3 beers then I don’t think it will work, plus he lied on his profile & said he was a non-smoker & he was a smoker. So after 3 months & like $80 I got nowhere so I deleted my account. I was very specific that I didn’t like or want kids or guys with kids and 90% of the guys I got had kids! I was specific that I wanted someone close to home (like 10 miles) and everyone lived in like Saginaw, plus I don’t like the fact that you can’t search for people…you get matched & that’s it & I’m sorry but I like browsing profiles & picking the people that I find attractive, not the people you SAY I’m compatible with.
Chemistry: Same as Match but without the Dr. Phil issue…I just can’t afford this site either.
Plentyoffish.com: This site is free, so I figure I have nothing to lose, I’ll let you know how it goes but I’ve already been chatting with a couple people & it’s only been like 3 days. The nice thing about this site is you can search for booty calls, husbands, friends, pen pals…whatever you want it’s probably on there.Okcupid: This site is my favorite, it's kind of like Myspace for dating! They have quizzes & questions that you can answer to help gauge compatibility with others, it's actually fun & I think the people are in general younger & just more of a technology based community if you will, they are the Facebook/Myspace types if that helps. Anyway, I've met some awesome people on here & I suggest it to people all the time.
If you want to see this person again, don’t sleep with them on the first date.
In the art of Tucker Max I am deciding to post a dating application on my site, now since I gear this site toward women I don’t expect it to be filled out and returned but I just may keep a few on my person and when I get hit on at a bar I’ll have the drunk freaks fill it out & see if they are worth my time, mainly this is for laughs although the questions & what not that are on here are real and represent what I’m looking for in a man. If by chance you are a man & interested in filling this out, by all means please do so & don’t forget to include a pic!
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